Fire Emblem: War Game
by zeldablizzard
Summary: Seven teens awaken to find themselves trapped in a Fire Emblem fanfiction! This raises a variety of questions: How did we get here? How can we get back out? Why the hell can't I walk diagonally? Follow their journey to figure out just what's going on!
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1-The First Chapter**

"Are you awake yet?"

Zach heard the voice, but wasn't able to respond. He was lying on his back, and his eyes, which he was trying to force open, were informing him that it was far too bright.

"Are you awake yet?"

Zach racked his brain, trying to remember what had happened before now. It was all too hazy, nothing was coming back to him.

"Are you awake yet?"

Okay, that was getting _really _annoying. Oh, something was coming back to him! Zach remembered sitting down and typing something...What was he typing?

"Are you awake yet?"

Zach made a mental note that once his arms started working, he would have them injure whatever was making that noise. Now, what was he starting to type? It was some kind of story...His eyes had adjusted enough to the light to open a bit. He saw that the walls of the room he was in were wooden. The entire room seemed fairly medieval. A bald old man with a small beard sat by his bed.

"Oh, you're awake", the man said. "I found you and your friend outside of my house unconscious. I've been sitting by your side since then. It's been about a day and a half."

"You've been asking me if I was awake for a solid day and a half?". Zach groggily asked. "Don't you have a life?"

"Not really.", the man said "My job is to pretty much sit here and give you some exposition..."

"Wait...That's your job?', Zach mumbled sleepily. "That doesn't make any sense."

More was coming back to him now. He shook his head to try and wake himself up.

"I'm Frederick, by the way.", the man said. "What's your name?"

"I...I'm Zach.", Zach said. He thought he understood what was going on. "This all seems kind of familiar."

"Your name is Zach? What an odd-sounding name.", Frederick said.

"Okay, something's definitely wrong here.", Zach murmured. "Waking up without any memories...Either I've been trapped in a video game, or I just got hit with one hell of a date rape drug...Well, my ass doesn't hurt, so I'm probably in a video game. That makes sense."

"I see by your attire that you two are travelers"

"Okay, I've heard that before...Lyn! That's right! I'm in some version of Fire Emblem!"

"Would you share your story with me?"

Zach crawled out of the bed.

"No, no, man. Look, I'm really grateful you helped us, but I really have to go.", he said, but then stumbled and fell over. "Or I should share my story. That works too."

"Wait for just a minute.", Frederick said, then turned to a bed on his other side. Inside the bed was Zach's cousin, Matt. "Are you awake yet?"

"Damnit.", Zach thought. "Okay, so I sat down and I started typing...something...And now I'm apparently in a video game. Wait a second...It's coming back to me...Oh, shit."

"Are you awake yet?"

"Damnit, I'm in a _fanfiction."_, Zach said aloud. "Hey. Uh...Frederick? I'm kinda starving. Do you have anything I can eat? Maybe some water?"

"Oh, of course!", the old man said. "I'll put some stew on."

He got up and walked into an adjoining room. Zach got up to his knees and slapped his cousin's cheek. Slowly, the boy's eyes opened.

"Zach? What's going on?", he asked slowly.

"Okay, this is going to sound crazy, but I think we're in a Fire Emblem fanfiction."

Matt didn't say anything.

"Matt? Are you okay?", Zach asked, concerned.

"Are you high out of your goddamned mind?", Matt asked laughing, but then he coughed. "I feel like shit."

"Okay, there's this guy named Frederick that's helping us. He's making stew right now."

"Why would we be in a fanfiction?!"

"I think it's _my_ fanfiction."

"_You_ write fanfiction?"

"Well, this is my first one. I thought the story was funny enough to make it worth it. It was gonna be a parody."

"What's it about?"

"It's about seven teens that get stuck in the Fire Emblem universe. It's you, me, and five of my friends."

"Frickin' irony.", Matt scowled. "Are you saying this is your fault?"

"Um...It might be, yeah. But how was I supposed to know writing it would make it happen?!"

"I don't know! Hell, I don't know half of what's going on at all! What is Fire Emblem!?"

"It's that strategy game we played at my house, remember?"

"Oh, that game sucks."

"Screw you."

"Bite me."

"Suck it."

"Nerd."

"Dumbass."

They were interrupted by Frederick standing in the door with two steaming bowls.

"The stew is ready.", he said, then turned to Matt. "Oh, you're awake."


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two-In A Fanfiction**

Zach waited as Frederick asked Matt all the questions he had asked him earlier. Frederick gave the cousins the two bowls he was holding, and went back for his own bowl.

"So you're telling me that we're in a fictional universe based on _another_ fictional universe?", Matt hissed.

"Kinda mind-blowing, when you think about it."

"I hate you so damn much."

"Don't be like that. This situation could be plenty worse."

"How the hell could it be worse!? We, and probably five others, are now stuck in your crappy fanfiction about a crappy Nintendo game!"

"Okay, first off, Fire Emblem is freaking fantastic. Second, it could be worse because we might not have found each other."

"That doesn't sound too bad right now."

"Third, we can't afford to be fighting right now. We should focus on...I dunno, finding the rest of the people stuck here, if they're actually here, and then figuring out how to get out."

Matt took a deep breath and closed his eyes.

"Alright. You're right, I'll give it to you this time. We gotta get outta here before we go crazy. But once we get out of here, I am going to kill you."

"Sounds good to me."

Frederick, holding a third steaming bowl, entered the room and sat in the chair between the beds.

"Now, tell me your stories."

"Uh...Stories?", Matt mumbled, trying to think.

"We really have no idea.", Zach lied. "I don't remember anything about myself."

"You just told me your name."

"Oh, right, I remember my name. And nothing else. My name is all I remember."

"Dumbass...You're a sucky liar.", Matt thought, inaudibly groaning. "Only a total moron would fall for that."

"Oh, you poor children!", Frederick exclaimed. "I'll do whatever I can to help you, alright?"

"Well, you could tell us where we are.", Zach said. "Do you have a map?"

"I do, in fact!", the old man said. "He walked over to a table and picked up a rolled piece of parchment. "Here we are. This is the town of Tutoria, in the country Selictia."

Matt raised his eyebrows at Zach and mouthed the word: "Tutoria?". Zach shrugged.

"Uh...I think I know where we are now.", Zach said, taking the map. "Alright, I think I'm just going to sleep a bit more. Thanks for the food."

"Uh...Yeah. I'm gonna sleep some more, too. So, you should leave. So we can sleep."

"Dumbass.", Zach thought. "That's just begging for suspicion."

"Alright, I'm going to leave you two alone now. Call if you need anything.", Frederick said smiling. He walked out and closed the door behind him.

"You know where we are?", Matt whispered.

"Of course, I made this place up, remember?", Zach whispered back, grinning.

"Alright, so who else was in this fanfiction? Who else will be here?'

"Let me think...You and me, then Trevor, Michael, Bradley, Charlie, and Amy."

"Oh, nobody I know. Awesome. So, do you remember where they are?"

"I think so.", Zach said, poking points on the map lightly. "Yeah, actually, they shouldn't be far from here. We should be able to find 'em pretty fast. The only part of the story I really had planned was everyone finding each other. Well, and this gag involving shooting a knight out of a catapult."

"Ha, freaking hilarious. Poor bastard.", Matt chuckled.

"Alright, so all we have to do is get out of this guy's house."

"We're breaking out? Of an old guy's house? Freaking. Hard. Core.", Matt laughed.

"What?! I mean, I guess we could...I was just going to wait until, y'know, I could feel my legs."

"Oh, c'mon, breaking out would be awesome."

"Ah, I guess you're right. But what if he sees us? He seems pretty bent on keeping us here."

"I dunno. I guess we knock him out."

"Are you crazy?!", Zach hissed, then considered. "I'm living in my own fanfiction based on a video game. I may not be the best judge. I guess the guy _is_ an NPC, it's not like he matters."

"That's the asshole spirit. So are you in?"

"Yeah, I'm in!"

Both of them worked their way to their feet.

"Alright, we gotta do this quietly...Stealthily...Like a ninja...", Zach whispered. He took a cautious step forward, and fell flat on his face.

"What, did you forget how to walk?", Matt chuckled, then fell himself.

Laying side-by-side, they looked at each other.

"We could go back to the old plan. You know, the one where we wait until we can walk?", Zach suggested.

"Okay...Yeah, that sounds good, too...", Matt mumbled, then closed his eyes and began snoring.

"This is ridiculous.", Zach thought. "Stuck in a video game...fanfiction...thing...sleepy..."

He felt his eyes close, then slipped into a deep sleep.


End file.
